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So, I ask the waitress for the Déjà’ Blue Martini, dirty.  It’s on the menu as a featured drink and dirty just means I want the bartender to splash a little olive juice in the glass.  The marketing is very clever.  It’s made with Sky vodka which comes in a blue bottle and is garnished with hand-stuffed blue cheese olives.  I have never been much of a martini drinker because first of all, they are very strong – straight alcohol.   And, for the most part, I think vodka tastes terrible.  However, I LOVE olives, so I keep trying.  Besides, the glass the martini is served in looks cool.

I’ve had a blue cheese martini before.  My favorite bartender Paul makes the best with Grey Goose vodka.  He knows the trick about getting the vodka really cold and he knows the exact right amount of dirty to make mine.  Sadly, the bar he works for just transferred him to Zionsville and that’s a little far to drive for a cocktail so I decide to give the Déjà Blue a try.

My girlfriends and I are chatting away when the waitress returns with our drinks, so without a glance, I give mine a sip.  Yuck, it tastes like slightly chilled vodka with a lot of vermouth and my olives are the garden variety pimento stuffed kind.  Now, I know I’m going to sound like a martini snob here but, I ordered the Déjà Blue.  Again, I tell you it’s on the menu as a featured drink.

 So, I stop the waitress and say, “Um, I ordered the Déjà Blue Martini and it’s supposed to have blue cheese stuffed olives.”  Remember, it’s all about the olives, people. 

The waitress replies, “Uh, yeah, the bartender hasn’t stuffed any today.”

My girlfriends and I stare at her in anticipation of an extended explanation and she just stares back in silence.  Finally, the waitress asks, “Do you want me to go stuff some for you?”

 To which I reply, I’ll admit with a slight tone of sarcasm, “Yes, please.”  I’m pretty sure when she turned to walk away, she was rolling her eyes.

Now, I’ve been a waitress and a bartender, in my day, and I wonder…when did it become acceptable to substitute another item than what the customer ordered because, “I don’t feel like making it right now.”?  Is it also ok to deliver an empty glass to a customer who ordered orange juice because, “Sorry, we haven’t squeezed any oranges today.”?  Or, to serve a Mushroom Quiche without the mushrooms because, “we haven’t sliced any mushrooms yet.”?

So the waitress stuffed my olives and my martini was just O.K.  The olives (I hope she didn’t spit in them) tasted great.  But, I still miss Paul.

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